Streetlamps under streetlamps: Clandestine meetings, the slip of bra straps, tap of a stiletto, a kiss at your nape. These are the things that we think of when we think “affair”.
One time, a neighbor told me that she had left an earring at her boyfriend’s home so she could ask him later where it came. She did. He wasn’t sure what to say. After a while, she realized he was seeing other women. She broke the news to him.
When a woman feels that her boyfriend is cheating on her, there are obvious signs she looks for. For example lipstick on the collar. In college, there was a woman who only dated married men in sociology class. She said it was all fine and dandy. These men were not bothersome. She didn’t wear lipstick, so it wouldn’t be possible for it to land on someone’s collar. For the same reason, she didn’t use perfume.
When suspecting something, women will first look at bank statements, credit cards statements, phone bills and text messages, as well as airline schedules, plans, wallets, and cars. If you pay attention, these things can lead you in the right direction.
Many people find themselves in this position because they have narrowed down the suspects to a handful of people based on their instincts. They can tell when a partner arrives late, with alcohol on their breath and looking like they’ve just had a fight. It would be reasonable to expect someone like this to at least get straightened up before meeting you. A woman I was friends with had an affair for a long time with a married man who had four children. I tried to tell her to stop but she refused. This is why I am no longer friends. It was unbearable. Needless to mention, she said that her husband had ordered her the same soap as he used at home for her so that his wife wouldn’t get any other scents on him when he showed up.
When it comes to women, a change in sexual behavior can also be something to watch out for.
Cheating spouses may seek to make things better after not doing so before, or they may be looking for more or less time with their partner. This is often a strange area.
A man or woman who is having an affair will alter their clothes, hair, shaving routines and mannerisms.
If you have tried everything, from keeping awake to hear if they go to bed at night to tape the door with Scotch tape to see if they’ve gone, you might need to resort to more serious strategies to accomplish the task. You can hire a private investigator to help you accomplish this. Your boyfriend will likely put a GPS device on his car to track him and take photos.
You can purchase a GPS at your local spy shop and attach it with a magnet on the car’s interior or exterior. It doesn’t have to be attached anywhere. You can simply leave it in your car. Do it yourself if you don’t want to pay an expensive fee for the photos. You can also ask a friend to do it.
You can either admit that you suspect something is wrong in your marriage or relationship, or push for the truth until you discover it. As they say, then the “ball is in your hands”.