Relationship Issues — Eleven Confirmed Reasons For Extramarital Affairs

Extramarital Affairs: Why?

There are many reasons why people have extramarital affairs. However, these are the main reasons that I was able confirm based on my research and this particular experience which I will share with you.

My friends and I used to party almost every weekend when we lived in New York a few years back. After having a great time at the club, I decided to leave to get a few drinks for my friends. As I waited for my drink to be delivered, I noticed a beautiful young woman sitting alone enjoying a drink.

I complimented her on her beautiful dress, which was an honest compliment — and we had a short friendly conversation. After being served, I paid the bartender and told her it was nice to talk to me. Then I went to go with my friends.

Two weeks later, she was at a Manhattan clothing store. We had a short friendly conversation after we met and greeted one another. We exchanged our phone numbers before we parted ways. She told me that I could reach her at any hour of the day.

I decided to call her one day to check on her health. To my surprise, a man answered the phone. He was extremely friendly and allowed me to talk to her without any problems. That was when I found out that she had a husband. She told me to not worry about him and said that she would talk to me about their situation another time.

I didn’t intend to call her again. It would have been disrespectful to me and was just not right. Two weeks later, she called me to tell me why she wanted to see other people. Evidently, she wasn’t the only married woman to feel this way. Her conversation revealed that one of her friends was already in a relationship with another person for other reasons. I gathered a lot of information from her and came up with the conclusion that extramarital affairs can occur for many reasons.

Here are some reasons why:

  1. Some people are unhappy with their marriages.
  2. under pressure at home
  3. Some are looking for status.
  4. They can assert their independence.
  5. Some people try to punish their spouses.
  6. Some people have lost their love.
  7. Never quite got over an ex-partner.
  8. Some people are not able to have sex with their spouse, and vice versa.
  9. Some are married to people who are rarely home.
  10. Some are in long distance marriages.
  11. According to one psychologist, some people are drawn by the temptation of the forbidden.

This led me to agree more with what I’ve heard over and over again – that men are less likely to get emotionally involved in extramarital relationships than women, and they also find it easier to seperate sex and love. Women, on the other side, are more likely to romance an extramarital relationship and get involved in a full-blown romantic affair.

A survey was conducted in the early 1990s. It found that about half of all men and 25% of all women had experienced extramarital sex in a sample. The rate of extramarital sex among women in the young-adult group (the early twenties) was particularly low at only 8 percent. Researchers believe that this lower rate among women than for men is changing. In 1980, extramarital sex was at a low rate among middle-class, young women. It was just below 33 percent among men of similar backgrounds.

Researchers were unable to confirm that these figures indicate an increase in extramarital affairs among females. They believed that today’s women are more likely to confess to marital infidelity to men than they were to admit it.


It is important that people realize that their behavior does not necessarily reflect their values. Many Americans believe that extramarital sexual activity is wrong. Those who support it in principle don’t think they would want their spouse to engage in sex with anyone else.